I was 26 when I joined the RN as an Instructor Officer in September 1990. Earlier that year I had attended the AIB and the part of the process I had been most anxious about was the personal interview, which in those days was conducted by a Wren Officer. What was I going to say when she asked me if I was gay? 'Yes' would have put an end to my naval ambitions, but I knew 'No' was not true. But she never asked me that question. What she did ask was if I had ever had a sexual experience with another man. Inwardly breathing a big sigh of relief I answered truthfully 'No'. I had been thinking about joining the navy for a number of years and during this period of my life had finally accepted that being gay wasn’t a phase I was going through, something I had suspected all along, but I do recall making a conscious decision to hide my sexuality because it was incompatible with the military career I was contemplating. I put career before personal life, although I did promise myself if I didn't pass the AIB I would accept who I was and find a boyfriend.